Some people have a higher expectation of me than I have of myself. I know my limits, but they won’t take the time to educate themselves on my limits. It is tiring to try to explain why I won’t be attending an event, when they do not understand my reasoning because they are not educated on the illness. I have tried many times to explain, but I am met with frivolous comments of “get over it”, “let it go”, etc.
I’m sorry, but I’m not able to be in large groups any more. I have changed. I have tried to “overcome”, but I can’t do it. I like being in a quiet atmosphere. I do not function well in an overcrowded setting. As I get tired and stressed, I lose my words, I say things that hurt people. I take things wrong and get my feelings hurt.
I can even be too tired when I get online and take something horribly wrong. I should learn not to get on the PC when I am overly tired. My expectation of myself is that I can get a few emails taken care of before a nap and then finish up afterwards, but today I think I hurt someone’s feelings and I want to say I’m sorry. I hope they are reading this and accept my apology.